Matthew 5:1-12
"Now when he saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to Him, and He began to teach them, saying:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness,for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the sons of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Where is there a more appropriate verse for Father's Day? Teaching the Beatitudes is what every great father strives for during the rearing of a child. To teach the Beatitudes is to instill happiness in your child. A happy child with such parenting will be self-assured and content.
Parenting during difficult times can be complicated when trouble is serious and is directly correlated with your child. We want to scoop them up, protect them, and gently guide them into being successful. Sometimes we may find ourselves in a situation, gearing up to saddle our child with unearned success and in the meantime set them up for failure.
A couple of year's go Mark's daughter tried out for the local soccer club. She wanted to be a part of the competitive team that travels throughout the state. She didn't make the cut. "Marie had been the star of her rec team the year before." Mark said. "My wife and I thought this was a huge miss on the club's part." Mark knew the local competitive soccer coach through business ventures. He asked him if Marie could be given a chance to play for the competitive team. Feeling pressured, the coach agreed and placed an extra jersey aside for his newest team member.
Looking back, Mark feels he made a huge mistake. "She was by far the weakest player on the competitive team," Mark admitted. "Sadly, she felt pressure from the other girls on the team, too, because they knew she wasn't supposed to be there. Her confidence suffered in the meantime." Unfortunately, Mark realized the club was probably right with their initial decision.
As an educator I've seen many parents due a disservice to their children. When parents intervene because they don't want to see any wrong things happen to their child, they end up swooping in and trying to fix everything. This could be anything from a low grade to a lack luster paper or project. Unfortunately, after the parents leave, thinking they've fixed the situation, the kids faces reveal it all.
They get three strong messages:
Things can never go wrong
Having feelings besides those of accomplishment is bad
Parents don't trust them to muddle through messy times
The most valued thing you can do for your child is to let that child feel the scope of the emotional response when something goes wrong. By acknowledging with your child the disappointment, regret, hurt, anger, and frustration, you send a message that it is OK to feel those emotions. There is nothing shameful about being frustrated or hurt, there is nothing 'bad' about feeling angry or regretful. These are all normal human emotions that make us feel a certain way - maybe sad or lost.
Then after talking about the feeling we can talk about choosing a good reaction, what we will do, and not be a victim to the circumstance. Simply put, pray for healing and move on. Keep the beatitudes while parenting. What a wonderful resource for your personal parent handbook!