"Keep me as the apple of the eye, hide me in the shadow of Your wings."
We can be our own worst critic. We don't need any help from anyone else defining what is weak in our character. In fact, most of us are quite aware of our own faults and work on them consistently. Yet, despite the above quote we can be really hard on ourselves. We strive for perfection which is actually an unreachable goal to begin with.
Some days so difficult. We pester ourselves at our jobs envisioning the perfect scenario and strive for it each day. We work tirelessly as a parent setting up the optimal frontier in raising our children. We aim to be good friends and be there whenever needed, picking up the pieces, wondering why that friend just can't listen to begin with. We carve, nurture, and hone that perfect living environment for our family, often, working futile hours trying to keep up with it all.
Then to top it all off, we beat ourselves up when we can't keep up with it all. We wonder why we missed that point or failed to be at that meeting. We stay awake countless hours at night replaying that same tape over and over wondering how we could have prevented failure. What are we doing to ourselves? Does God expect perfection?
Of course not, as long as we keep pressing forward, trying to do our best, we can hold our head up high, knowing that God is changing us and molding us into his image. Of course, during these times your life may seem far from glorious. You may have several problem areas that need attention, areas you need to overcome. Maybe you have some bad habits to break such as getting inundated quickly and having angry outbursts, but God doesn't expect you to beat yourself up. God is in the process of changing you already so accept your faults.
You must learn to accept yourself, right here and now. Sit quietly, and pray, "God, I have a hard time seeing myself the way you see me. Please touch me and remind me through your words that I am special. Keep molding me into a better person, but help me accept who I am." We have to learn to accept ourselves, with all our faults if we want to go to a higher level. We need to come to grips we do have weaknesses. There is imperfection in our life. We are not perfect. We need to realize there will always be imperfections in our life. Nothing will ever be perfect.
Remember none of these imperfections surprise God. He made you. He knows everything there is to know about you. He knows the good as well as the bad. Yet, most importantly, he loves you. So you mine as lighten up on yourself. God knows he is in the process of changing you; you need to know this, too.
The most interesting reading in history is the lives of those who wrote the Bible. Opening a door into each of their daily lives, you will find faults. You'll find idiosyncrasies that baffled them at that time also. Peter, the apostle, was characterized as a strong willed and courageous man; however, at times he could be quick to speak, impulsive, and impetuous. Picture Peter admonishing himself for opening up his mouth to quickly without thought! We here, today, are no different.
Sometimes you may say or do things that you wish you didn't. Sometimes you may have a bad attitude, be selfish, or unforgiving. Learn to ask God's forgiveness for your failure, mistakes, and sins. Then, move on! Stop beating yourself up! You are not perfect! God knows your heart. He knows that you are trying. Make the decision now to hold up your head high and feel good about yourself knowing that God approves of you, accepts you, and is pleased with you!